Those STUPID Chinese nurses are as scholarly as spreading butter on sliced bread!

Despite what those NYTimes employees tell you, George W. Bush is as cheery as a funeral procession, I should know!!

Those whistle blowers are lying to you: my SUPER hair stylists are as cranky as Santa clause!

Those whistle blowers are lying to you: my BRILLIANT Trump employees are as magical as Paul Daniels!

Those REGRETTABLE Obama cronies are as adventurous as a hobbit!

Those SICK media clowns are as nightmarish as a theocracy!

Despite what those Washington insiders tell you, Marlene Dietrich is as adaptive as a paraplegic, BELIEVE ME!!

Southern states are red,
crass casino foyers are gold,
my current/ex-wives would die for me,
and think Hillary's heart is cold

Those SAD CNN liars are as sensitive as a corduroy condom!

Despite what those German mechanics tell you, Baldrick is as impractical as a bicycle, I should know!!

Despite what those leakers tell you, Moses is as rousing as afternoon tea at the Ritz, BELIEVE ME!!

Those SAD FBI moles are as groundbreaking as a bag of dirty socks!

Despite what those CIA hardliners tell you, R2D2 is as spunky as a corpse, I should know!!

Despite what those NYTimes employees tell you, Kal El is as heroic as a smoke alarm, I should know!!

Despite what those NYTimes employees tell you, Blanche DuBois is as dainty as a sixteen wheeler, BELIEVE ME!!

Ketchup bottles are red,
IBM supercomputers are blue,
my diehard Republicans are the BEST,
and did the Democratic machine out-do

Despite what those Mueller spies tell you, Ophelia is as lovely as dog turds, BELIEVE ME!!

Trump MAGA hats are red,
Don Jr.'s cufflinks are gold,
my legal team are real patriots,
and want the border patrolled

Face-lift scars are red,
Pretty violets are blue,
my 5-star generals are HIGH energy,
and always give me my due

Those FAILING media crooks are as unpretentious as expensive minimalist design!

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